- Write a bunch of posts but never tell anyone you have a blog.
- Write one post, tell everybody you started a blog, then don’t write anything for a month.
- Fill your blog with every conceivable form of cheap advertising so that it drowns out your one lonely little post.
- Do not think about what your About page should say. In fact, don’t even write one. Just leave the default text that says you should replace it with your own writing.
- Don’t comment on other blogs.
- Leave yourself no time to comment on other blogs because you’re scrambling to write posts every night.
- Write about the blog itself or blogging… when your topic isn’t blogging.
- Do not get a FeedBurner, Technorati, Twitter, StumbleUpon, Blog Catalog, or MyBlogLog account.
- Have no idea what you’re trying to accomplish or what your audience wants.
- You tell me in the comments! What’s the 10th way to NOT launch a blog?
Here’s to your blogging success!
Michael Martine, Remarkablogger
Blog marketing is what I write about, Blog consulting is what I do.
PS – Yesterday, I said today’s post would be about how to launch a blog. See, the thing about having an editorial calendar is: it pays to read it correctly. So, um… sorry. Tomorrow’s audio post will be on how to launch a blog. I swear.
Hi Michael, Thanks for this.
How about fail to reply to commenters?
If that isn’t it, I’ve got an alternative.
Dave
I just ran into #4 yesterday. I visited a blog and went to the about page, where it told me to replace the text with something else. I thought, “Hmm.. ok.. can I replace it with YOU SUCK?!” First time I’ve run into that one.
My #10: Make sure your blog design is so ugly and painful to the eyes that I need to start drinking after I’ve left your blog, even though I haven’t drank since 1996.
#11: Make it so difficult to find the RSS subscriber thingy (or don’t have one at all) that I have to right click and view your page source, then search. I really love that.
[/end sarcasm]
10) Make the content all ME ME ME ME with no YOU at all.
p.s Amy, that was funny.
Since Dave gave my number one answer and Amy’s #10 was my #2 answer – How about not having a good purpose statement for your blog?
Is this a test for Newbies?
@Dave – Yup. You don’t put out the welcome mat and then make yourself unavailable.
@Amy – Ha ha, ugly is in the eye of the beholder! But not making it easy to subscribe? That’s just criminal!
@Writer Dad – Good point, but you know there’s an exception to that: the cult of personality blog. That’s where what the audience wants is the blogger. Granted, there aren’t too many of these, but I think Tim Ferriss comes close.
@Valerie – You must know what value you bring and be able to describe that easily, absolutely.
Everything is a test for Newbies!
How about making it painful to post a comment. I ran across a blog yesterday that made me set up a separate WP account just to post a comment. By the time I got through all that, which I did because I’m curious about how all this works, I couldn’t remember what I wanted to say. The flip side is not allowing comments at all. Also bad in my opinion.
James – WOW, this one will be hard to top!
Grrr, the one I’ve been dealing with lately are the bloggers who have comment habits such as:
1. As soon as you leave a comment on their post, they come and leave a “comment” on your most recent post as a “pay back” for commenting on theirs AND,
2. Their comment consists of nothing more than “Great post! Keep it up” etc, despite the fact that my comments are always quality comments and meaningful AND,
3. The don’t even read the post!!! but wants others to read theirs and leave quality comments! ARGH! My analytical software allows me to SEE LIVE who is reading my post, how long they take to “read” the post, the history of their visits etc.
One particular blogger does the above and hasn’t yet figured out their “comments” have been deleted but keeps on doing it. Since I’ve now unsubscribed from her blog and I know she’s not actually subscribed to mine but only does comment drive-bys, I’m sure she won’t even notice my disappearance from her comment section.
@Lin – You must be using Woopra. How do you like it?
All bloggers love to have high comment counts, but that means nothing if the comments aren’t worth reading. As Liz Strauss says, “Comments are content.” I would much rather have good comments than many comments, just like I would much rather have quality posts than frequent posts. Same principle.
Michael — When I say ugly, I mean using hot pink background with a white font, so that one goes blind looking at it.
A bad design that doesn’t give me a migraine is ok. 
LOL, yes I have Woopra and it’s AMAZING! Anyone who doesn’t have Woopra or hasn’t heard of Woopra needs to get it. It is a.w.e.s.o.m.e!
Liz Strauss is absolutely right about comments being content. It cracks me up when I read so much about “content is king” yadda-yadda but so many bloggers completely miss the point and value of commenting with meaningful comments as opposed to comment drivebys.
I’ve actually emailed several of the offending bloggers who leave those pathetic “great post” garbage comments and they respond with, “but we’re always told to comment on other blogs in order to get people to check out our blog”.
Yeah…well…your spam comment such as it is won’t bring you visitors since it will be deleted and no one is going to see it anyway. So there.
Lin,
Can you say what you mean please?
LOL, I love your straight forwardness. Your website’s title is so appropriate.
I left some comments, I hope they make the cut.
Michael,
I agree with not letting me subscribe as a big problem.If I love your blog, I WANT to subscribe to you, please don’t make it hard on me to be loyal to you!And a step further, I want to subscribe to comments so I can keep track of what is going on.
I also think it is difficult when people are very erratic in their posting unless they mention an absence. But if you are a prolific poster then drop off for a month then write one then drop off, it’s hard to grow.
@Lin – I’ve become friends with a few people I’ve emailed like that. Here is Woopra if anyone wants to go check it out.
@Valerie – Lin’s a great example of how to bring your personality into your blog.
@Wendi – I tend to not notice erratic posting. It just doesn’t make it onto my radar. But during a blog launch, everything should be planned out and scripted so that you make the best possible impression. And that means regular posts, as you say.
@Valerie, yeah I’m known for telling it like it is and I don’t hold back. Your comments came through just fine as did Michael’s.
The 10th way NOT to launch your blog has got to be: Launch your blog while learning to water ski while wearing loose fitting swim shorts.
Unless of course, your blog is about slap-stick comedy.
Here’s my #10 – a mistake I actually made one a blog I recently resurrected…create a blog with a domain name that targets a solution your audience craves…and write posts about a totally different topic. :0
My #10 would be not linking to your blog in the ENewsletter you’re also doing!
And I didn’t know about Woopra, so thanks.
Not “commenting” with obvious and blatant self-promotion ie, “check out my blog” @ (insert blog link) or, “I’ll be launching my new blog soon at …..” in the so-called comment without much else said. That’s called spam and is deleted without a moment’s hesitation.
Great list and very much how I advise my clients only positioned as a positive: HOW to launch your blog.
#10: on a business blog: no photo. How am I supposed to connect with you and take you seriously? A photo is one of the fastest ways to connect with a new reader.
#11: No tag line that identifies who the blog is for, what the blog is about and who you are.
More great ideas, everyone!
@Wife – yup, properly fitting attire is a must.
@Barry – Yeah, that could be a problem. Especially if you ever want to use contextual advertising like Google AdSense.
@Jean – I’m sure YOU would never do that!
@Lin – Right, if you’re not contributing value to the post, there’s no point in saying anything, because you’re just making a bad impression otherwise.
@Denise – I’m with you on your #11, but there are sometimes legitimate reasons why a blogger doesn’t have a portrait photo.
Set up a mock blog on your computer and practice with the software before you go live.
Before making a post ask yourself “why should anyone care about this post?”
[...] Martine of Remarkablogger fame has published an excellent post on how *not* to launch a new blog. I have to admit it made me wince – even though countless ebooks and websites have raised these [...]
I’ve completely overlooked commenting on other folk’s blogs since launching. Doh! Thanks for the wakeup call! I read plenty of blogs and have valuable opinions. How can I expect anyone to post a comment on mine if I won’t give my input to others?
@Dale – good ideas, but remember these are points on how to NOT launch a blog!
But I agree that your question is the best one to ask about everything you write: why would anyone want to read it? In other words: where’s the value?
@Andy – a comment blitz is a sure-fire way to get noticed and get some traffic. Be sure to provide value with your comments, though!
@Lin – Hi Lin. I actually emailed Michael personally, asked for an apology and requested him to delete my previous comment (which was on #19) about “launching my new blog soon” (without posting the link actually) because I already hit the “post comment” button after i’ve read the comment policy of not using a real name.
and once again, i’m sorry for that.
@Eric – very upstanding of you to do that. Big karma points for you, my friend.
As you can see by my own name here in the comments, a title is OK with a real name.
@Eric, Kudos to you for doing so. High five!
@Michael, I’ve become quite irritated with the number of keyword titles used instead of names and I’m going to add some text similar to yours near the comment box for people to know not to do it. Names with a title is fine too of course, but it’s gotten ridiculous lately.
@Lin – it will create extra headaches for you, because people don’t pay attention (not talking about you, Eric
) and you’ll have to spend more time deleting and marking comments as spam.
Darn it. I’ve been deleting as spam umpteen so-called comments with those ridiculous keyword “names” and then they come back asking Where is my comment?
Um…read my comment policy dude.
[...] post was on The Top 10 Ways to NOT Launch a Blog. With apologies to internet marketer Jeff Walker’s Product Launch Formula, this audio post [...]
[...] Michael Martine at Remarkablogger, The Top 10 Ways to NOT Launch a Blog. Hopefully, all Business and Blogging readers know not to try anything on this [...]
I have made most of these mistakes I just had tolaugh when I read your blog
Great tips you have helped me in advance
#10 – Don’t put any effort into editing your posts before you publish them. Readers will thoroughly enjoy your sloppy, erratic, repetitive writing riddled with spelling, punctuation and grammar errors.
[...] Comment on The Top 10 Ways to NOT Launch a Blog by Cecilia(14 September 2008) 10 Dont put any effort into editing your posts before you publish them. Readers will thoroughly enjoy your sloppy, erratic, repetitive writing riddle… [...]
#10 – Not stating your blogs purpose above the fold… If people can’t come to your blog and instantly know what you are about you have failed.
@Seth – thanks for adding your number 10! That’s a good one.